Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Ten Humorous Ways to Stop a Temper Tantrum

You probably shouldn't take all of these seriously.  Just thought I would throw that out there.  But to go with yesterday's temper tantrum post, I thought I would share my temper tantrum stoppers.

1)  Throw a bucket of cold water on the child.  I mean you see this in movies with drunk people or people that are in a bar fight.  Surely it would work on an unruly toddler.

2)  When your child is hitting their head into the wall, ignore it until they eventually knock their self unconscious.  Ahhh peace and quiet.

3)  Bribe the child with gummy bears.  Okay I will admit I do occasionally actually use this one.  One gummy bear has many wonderful qualities.  Destructo will lay still for a diaper change or let me easily put his shoes on.  But I have been using those fruit leather strips cut into pieces so at least it is made from actual fruit?


 4)  Throw yourself down on the floor and scream and kick.  This will distract your child enough that they will end their tantrum all by themselves.

5)  Buy a baby sized straight jacket.

6)  Wear ear plugs and close your eyes.  If you can't hear or see it, the tantrum must not be happening.  Right?

7)  Put the child out back until they calm down.  I mean this works for the dog.   Shouldn't it work for Destructo?  (I kid, I kid.  I don't put my child out back when he is acting up.  I just fantasize about how easier life would be if kids were like pets and you could just put them outside in your fenced in back yard when they were not behaving.)

8)  Buy your child a punching bag and let him take his aggressions out on it.  Okay this could be the most serious piece of advice in this post.  I plan on doing just that.  Plus added bonus maybe Destructo will become the next MMA star?

9)  Dog crate.  Need I say more.  When you have a young puppy, you crate them if they are chewing up shoes or destroying furniture until they learn to act right.  I am sure this would work with a kid?  Can you see the animal science major in me coming out in these faux suggestions?


10)  Feed your child Thanksgiving turkey with every single meal.  Tryptophan is a natural sedative.  That is why you feel so sleepy after you eat your giant Thanksgiving dinner.  So a small dose of tryptophan three times a day might make your child more even keeled.

Okay so obviously none of these suggestions is really a valid way to stop a temper tantrum.  But hey at least you hopefully got a laugh out of them.  Because as I have said a million times, you can either laugh or cry and currently I am choosing to laugh.

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20 comments:

  1. Haha! Some days even the most insane ones seem like a good idea. Like the doggie crate and the ear plugs. Tantrums are the worst and figuring out why requires a degree in toddler temper tantrums. Ugh. So funny, though!

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    1. I tell you I feel like I need to go back to school to figure him out some days. Ear plugs would have been awesome on Sunday though.

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  2. Number 10 all the way!!!! That way I could have Thanksgiving leftovers all year round. :)

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    1. Wouldn't that be awesome. Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday.

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  3. I often want to lie down and have a temper tantrum myself; not a bad idea ;).

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  4. Hahahaha....when I read the first one I just couldn't stop laughing already, do you believe that I actually have tried almost everything??!! Lol! Except the cold water...although it seems to be a good idea too ha ha...Indeed when the kids show tantrum and I pretend to mirror them, they get distracted..but gotta tell you it doesn't last long :P

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    1. Man I was hoping those would solve all my tantrum woes. :( Too bad they have already been tried and found lacking. I guess it is cold water time.

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  5. just too funny babe

    one time I started crying with Dinosaur and it worked for a few minutes. He stopped to see what was wrong with me, when he was satisfied it was nothing he continued, LOL

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    1. I love when toddlers stop their tantrum to make sure something is the way it should be or that what they are mad about is still making them mad and then start again. Destructo did this the other night because we had to come in from outside. I was a sweet momma and let him bring his lawn mower in and everything. Every time he saw the dang lawn mower, the tantrums started over. Grrr.

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  6. Found you on the mommy brain mixer this week! Following and commenting from http://fluffimama.blogspot.com/
    I hope you'll come check me out and do the same. Thanks <3

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    1. I am already following your blog, but I stopped by. I love the eye candy post!

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  7. hee hee, this was funny :)

    I totally do the bribe with candy!

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  8. I like the turkey idea! Can't wait until Thanksgiving! lol

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    1. I know! It is my favorite holiday. I am going to eat so much I won't be able to move afterwards.

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  9. Very cute thoughts...humor is such an awesome gift to help us weather those little storms in life! Found you cohosting at Katherines...I am now your new follower!Feel free to follow me back at Seven flowers!...Love and Blessings..from Nicole!

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    1. Thanks for following me. I live by the motto laugh or cry and mostly choose to laugh. I will check out your blog now.

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  10. These are hilarious! I was thinking instead of the bucket of water, use a squirt gun...it works on the family pet, right?

    Stopping by from the Harvest of Friends Blog Hop. Hope you can come by 100lb Countdown, Like Me on FB Push 2 a New You or Follow Me on Twitter @100LBC

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    1. A squirt gun would be quicker and easier. Lighter too. Hmmm maybe I need to consider that.

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  11. LOL! Love this! It really is so important to keep your sense of humor through the tough days. Now I'm hungry for gummy bears! :) Thanks for linking up! Hope to see you back this week!

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    1. Your comment just made me want gummy bears. I am just a Pavlovian dog apparently.

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